Are you a villifier? I love to get together with other operators and talk it out. Share ideas, see what others are doing, pick-up tips and start thinking about the future. It is energizing and I love it. Inevitably, however, the conversations turn to complaining customers and employees who don't seem to have been given any skill or motivation. This sharing is cathartic. To finally have a peer group that really understands what you're talking about is so vital to our survival in the world of small business, we must not cast it aside. However, the continual casting of employees and customers as the "villains" in your otherwise perfect season is a treacherous road toward self-fulfilling prophesy.
Villainous customers. Oh, yes, we've all had them. There are people who just can't have a good time anywhere and make it their mission to bring as many other people down with them as possible. At the end of the day, the guest stories are shared from employee to employee as a way of decompressing the stress of the day. They range from dangerous to humorous, but follow the same pattern of "villainous guest": "Guests are a problem that we have to deal with." "Customers will rob you blind if you let them." "Customers are idiots who can't park correctly." "Customers think they own the place, but then throw trash on the ground."
Villainous employees. "I had to tell him three times on three different days to get off his butt and sweep the floor. Kids just don't know how to work these days!" Sound familiar? Employees don't always measure up to our standards and that is very frustrating, however, we cannot operate a business of any size without employees. Employees are not a "problem" that can be solved, but an ongoing project to manage. That's why getting the results you want out of your employees is called "management". There will never be a time when all situations are solved completely, so don't waste your energy expecting that magical day to come.
Vilification breeds contempt. Ok, so customers and employees may behave like bad people, but you can't view them as villains? Doesn't sound right, does it, but that's exactly what I'm saying. Vilification breeds contempt. If you harbor contempt in your heart for either group of people, slowly over time you will start treating customers and employees with contempt. It will start slowly, but it will build until you don't like your job, your customers and your business. Contempt is one of the strongest emotions and when you really feel it in your heart, you cannot contain it. If you cannot contain it, you will show it. If you show it, you're finished. No one wants to work for a contemptuous person and certainly no one wants to do business with one.
Customers to guests. There is a solution, but it is one only you can implement with self control and a long distance look toward ongoing success. Customers are only there for a transaction, you need to treat them like guests. Treat them like guests who have done you a great service by their arrival and whom you are sorry to see depart. Treat them better than guests, because they actually paid to visit you. Make their day easy. Make your signage clear. Make your staff helpful before the guest has a question. Change your nomenclature so your staff calls them guests. Celebrate those who care for your guests each time they do something exceptional.
Villains to partners. At the NAFDMA Advanced Learning Retreat, I loved Patti's approach to employees underperformance: "I think first, what part of this is my fault. How have I fail to make it clear what we expect?" Underperforming employees are your fault. Excuses such as "kids just don't know how to work anymore" are merely cop-outs for lack of training. Remember that simply "telling" an employee does not qualify as training and usually results in failure; failure that wastes your time and their time. The Tanner's, also sharing at the ALR, shared Marilyn Tanner's cleaning training as "She cleans it with them and in front of them, showing them before and after following the procedure. If the bathrooms don't meet spec after that, the employee redoes the work until they do." Mrs. Tanner makes them partners.
The common assumption is that employees are out to get you, slack off and or rob you. That simply isn't the case in all but the smallest percentage of total workers throughout your business life. Employees do come with few built-in skills, but we've found them very motivated to work, learn and earn as it's tough times all around. Parents aren't throwing money around like they used to and kids seem to have motivation. They do need guidance, patience and training and that, is your job.
Shift your frame of reference. If you experience a negative guest interaction, you are brought to an extremely short frame of reference. You have to deal with that guest right now and handle the problem immediately. After that, the rest of your day can seem like you're viewing events through short-sighted glasses. The key, as a manager or owner, is to reset your vision to an appropriate distance from the problem. You might have had one lousy guest, but it happened in a day of 100 or 1,000 or 10,000 guests. In it's proper frame of reference, the proper sight-distance, that one event is dwarfed by the overwhelmingly positive response from the other guests.
NLP. Neurolinguistic programming is the science of programming your mind, efforts and outcomes through the use of language that promotes the desired result. Many years ago I made the conscience choice to use NLP in my marriage. I pledged that no matter what, I was going to, at the very minimum, refer to my wife as beautiful at least once during the day and say "I love you" every night before we went to sleep. Seems like no big deal right? Without a conscience effort, you never know what you're going to get. Conscientiously choosing your words creates the environment you desire. Don't believe me? Ask your wife if she'd prefer a world in which she was referred to as "beautiful and loved." Trust me, this stuff works. (Switch the gender, ladies and man-up the adjectives. It still works.)
NLP with your guests. Program yourself to use phrases such as "We're glad you're here!, No worries!, No problem!, We've got you covered! Thanks for coming! Glad you had a good time!" This language makes them feel comfortable and reinforces for you that you are glad they came, no matter what problems they have. Don't you like to visit places that make you feel loved and appreciated? Your guests, under it all, are just people. They are drawn to people who treat them well, just as you are.
NLP with your employees. For a change, catch someone doing something right. Throw a "Nice work!, Great job!, That was crazy, but we did it! I like how you handed it." To some employees, they may only know you as the person who comes in and yells at them periodically! All that yelling and criticism encourages a culture of Duck & Cover. The assumption that employee performance increases because the employees are so scared of someone yelling at them again is completely false. Good employees will never tolerate a tyrant boss, particularly employees from Gen Y & the Millennials. By encouraging what you want, discouraging, but forgiving, mistakes, you build a culture of Achievement.
Guests are not the enemy. Employees are not villains. You are not going crazy, but you will if you cannot shift your frame of reference and start using Neurolinguistic Programming to fill your mind with the right thoughts that weed out contempt.
Remember, you are very thankful for guests coming to your business and because so many come, you need employees to care for them. You're thankful for those employees who are, for the most part, your partners in providing exceptional care for those guests....
for whom you are thankful...verrrrry thankful.....(repeat to yourself as many times as needed...)Have a great week.
Hugh
